About Me

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Nashville, TN, United States
I am a mom to amazing twin girls, a wife, and I work full time. I battled infertility for 2 years and over the course of treatments, a twin pregnancy, and raising twins I managed to gain about 80 lbs. I’ve lost about 50 lbs so far and would like to lose another 50 in my quest to become a hot mama.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Dream Infertility Clinic

So after a fun conversation with Carrie M., we decided we should open our fantasy IF clinic.  Here are some of the features we thought should be included.  Please feel free to add:=



  • 1.       Doctor’s with low patient case loads
  • 2.       Warm exam tables
  • 3.       Fuzzy blankets to cover yourself with while getting wanded
  • 4.       Warm speculums
  • 5.       Warm hands!
  • 6.       Warm lube
  • 7.       A person who’s whole job is to stand in the room and let you cry on them if needed or jump around and be a cheerleader if needed.
  • 8.       A reception area with wine and/or hard liquor for after those particularly difficult appointments
  • 9.       Absolutely NO BABIES ALLOWED IN THE CLINIC
  • 10.   A “you’ll get pregnant this month” guarantee
  • 11.   Low/no cost procedures
  • 12.   Masseuse to rub your back and shoulders while you wait
  • 13.   Stand in husbands-for when your husband just can’t be there.  Of course they would all look like Mr. McDreamy AND Mr. McSteamy.
  • 14.   A counselor on staff to help you with all of your crazy emotions and drug fueled mood swings
  • 15.   Chocolate in all of the rooms-because sometimes it just makes you feel better!
  • 16.   An acupuncturist on staff for before and after procedures-why leave the office if you don’t have to?
  • 17.   A wide array of [up to date] “materials” for DH to choose from when doing his “business” in a very private, but spacious locked room-because let’s face it…he’ll make his best batch of baby batter in something bigger than a broom closet with a collection of Ron Jeremy’s greatest 1980’s pornos.
  • 18.   Nurses that are all IF patients and know what it is like to be in our shoes.




















Feel free to add!!! 

14 comments:

  1. I think a money-back guarantee would be nice!

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  2. #12 Needs to include full body massages for when the stress of IF turns all your muscles into knots.

    And I especially like #14.

    You've done a most excellent job in creating the perfect IF clinic.

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  3. I LOVE this place!!! Great idea!! How about adding a mani/pedi station in the waiting room too!! :)

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  4. Funny story. The plaque on the "special room" at my new fertility office reads "The jungle room." Apparently it is well stocked. My husband scored. My dr actually has a speculum warmer drawer beileive it or not! They do exist. I kid you not!

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  5. How about someone who really does get back to you by the end of the day?

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  6. Can we add a facial to the list to help out the stress-induced pimples?

    My clinic actually has heated lube and warm speculums! Shocker. That's about it though -- I think I would trade that for some docs/nurses who were warm and didn't treat me like crap! Oh well!

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  7. YEA!!! Our clinic dream IS GOING to come true!!!!!! Love you girl!!!

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  8. No wall of "success babies" in every single hall way.

    and I agree with Missy! 100%

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  9. I like the masseuse and accupuncturist idea :) I would like to have something/someone in the waiting room that/who encourages the waiting patients to talk to each other- like sharing blog addresses/offering support to each other /etc!!

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  10. Warm lube is the best! Our doctors had that and it made a huge difference.

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  11. This clinic sounds great!!! Mine offers free tampons and pads in the bathroom and I always think, "if you could just get me pregnant, those wouldn't be necessary."

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  12. My #1 is the IF-patient nurses and staff. A MUST!! And not just the "I did IVF because it's my line of work and I wanted to know" or "so I could do gender selection"... a true IFer! :)
    Also, I would like *immediate* test results. hehe. Oh, and maybe a crystal ball. And a no-OHSS promise. No bruising meds. FREE meds. Hahaha, this is great. All these things would be fabulous :)

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  13. I want the address to this clinic when you open it, lol! It all sounds great to me.

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  14. Hi i am from Pakistan and 25 year old married. Can you kindly suggest any good infertility clinic in Lahore.

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