Well after a week of Viagra suppositories my lining acutally shrunk to 6.0mm and is no longer trilayer. My FET is officially cancelled.
I knew this was coming...mostly becaues I am accustomed to NEVER getting good news from the RE. It still knocked the wind out of sails when it was confirmed on U/S.
I have an appointment for January 4 to discuss what we will do next.
Today is the first day where my mind started crossing over to the "Could we live child-less" side. It is a scary and eerie thought. I can't imagine my life without ever having kids. I can't understand why God won't grant me this prayer. I can't understand why he's decided that a 14 year old girl on food stamps can have a baby and I can't. I can't understand why others don't understand that not everyone can get pregnant with a snap of the fingers.
I guess I won't get answers to any of these questions. But today, my heart aches just a little more and I grow just a little bit more weary. My soul feels broken and I am not sure how much more of this my soul or my marriage can handle.
I feel broken.