About Me

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Nashville, TN, United States
I am a mom to amazing twin girls, a wife, and I work full time. I battled infertility for 2 years and over the course of treatments, a twin pregnancy, and raising twins I managed to gain about 80 lbs. I’ve lost about 50 lbs so far and would like to lose another 50 in my quest to become a hot mama.

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Turkeys, endometrial linings, christmas shopping and other unrelated topics

Ok, now that I have gotten my cynical post out of the way (and yes…I do feel better now) here’s the skinny since my last post:

FET #1
This appears to be falling apart at the seams.  Where to begin…last week, went in for a lining check. It was up to 7.0mm.  E2 was at 850.  Looks good.  Just need to get one more millimeter before we can transfer.  So I make an appointment for an out of state monitoring visit at Shawnee Mission Infertility Clinic in Kansas (because nothing says Happy turkey day like having your vag wanded). So the women gives me all kinds of different numbers 6.2 then 7.0 then 7.1 and also tells me that there appears to be a pocket of mucous or blood inside the lining.  Great.  Break down number one occurs in the office.  Break down number 2 in the car.  Break down number 3 happens when my nurse calls to cancel my December 4th transfer. Breakdown number 4 happens while I’m at the in laws.  And so on and so forth.

So today I went in, and my f*cking lining is shrinking.  Yes, despite “accidentally” taking more estradiol valerate on Saturday and switching from oral to vaginal estrace, I seemed to have back slid by .2mm.  Great!  If there is any silver lining, apparently blondie that did my u/s in Kansas was totally wrong…there was no fluid in there.  Bitch.

So now I am starting to FREAK out.  I have so much time, money, and emotions invested in this cycle that I just can’t imagine having it cancelled.  So I am still awaiting a call from the RE, but it looks like they are going to increase my estrogen and start me on Viagra suppositories.  Weird, but hey, at this point if someone told me cutting off my pinky toe by papercut would get me pregnant, I would do it.

If no progress has been made by my next scan, this cycle is cancelled. 

Family, turkey, Christmas shopping, yadda yadda.  Thanksgiving is like you would imagine it.  BUT, while we were in Kansas we went to dinner with some of DH’s old high school football buddies.  I got a chance to talk to a couple, Ben and Carrie, that has had the same shitty luck we have had.  I would not wish our situation on anyone, but it was so nice to get to talk to someone my own age about infertility and the crappy hand we’ve been dealt.  They have been doing their IVF in the Czech which is apparently SOOOO much cheaper and more personable.  Please check out her blog for more info on it. http://benandcarriemug.blogspot.com/

I ran the Thanksgiving day 5K.  Beat my last time by 3 minutes.  Pretty pleased.

So I like the fact that fertility drug companies never miss an opportunity to get their name out there.  I found this particularly memorable while sitting bare bottomed on the u/s table. 

That’s about it for now.  Hopefully I’ll have some good news to report soon.

Here’s a little prayer I’ve been trying this cycle….

Prayer to St. Gerard

O good St. Gerard, powerful intercessor before the throne of God, wonder-worker of our day, I call upon you and seek your help. While on earth, you always fulfilled God's designs; help me, too, always do God's holy will. Beseech the master of life, from whom all parenthood proceeds, to bless me with offspring, that I may raise up children to God in this life and heirs to the kingdom of God's glory in the life to come.



  1. How often are you in KC? I live in Olathe! So sorry that the news lately has not been great. Hang in there!

  2. Emily...So sorry to hear about your Thanksgiving rollercoaster!! I will pray hard that they do NOT cancel your dec. 4th FET!!! ((HUGS)) - Priscilla

  3. Michele-DH's family lives there so I'd say we go back maybe 3-4 times a year. Are you going to a clinic in Olathe?

    Priscilla-thanks so much. You are such a doll.

  4. Agh! What an awful weekend! Sorry about all the horrible news :( I really hope your lining can thicken up and prepare to meet your embies! Oh I really hope hope hope! Good luck... :)

  5. I am thinking lining thickening thoughts for you!!! What a bummer about getting pushed back. I pray that you'll be able to transfer soon. Good luck!

  6. Ughhh so sorry things don't seem to be going as planned. I really hope your lining starts thickening up and you can make it to transfer. I love that prayer to St. Gerard -- my in-laws said it for us every night. It's beautiful.

    Hang in there ... I am thinking for you!

  7. I wear my St. Gerard medal every day...hasn't done crap to help, but I wear it!
    Hang in there...

  8. Emily--I cycled at RRC in Overland Park (c/p), so now we've decided to cycle at CCRM for IVF #2. Dr. Brabec was my RE.