Happy fetus-verary?

So tommorrow marks the big cross-over from the embryonic phase to officially becoming a fetus!  Well fetuses. Actaully, based on u/s...that happened last week. 

We had our first appointment with the OB/MFM this week.  It still feels fradulent to be sitting amongst "regular" pregnant women.  I felt out of place....like I just didn't belong there.

Feelings aside, we got to see our two beans again.  I must admit, I was a little nervous that one of them wasn't going to have a heartbeat or worse, neither of them would have a heart beat.  I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop.  I suppose that is the curse of IF.

The nurse did the measurements and both babies were measuring ahead of schedule which if fantastic.  There was some discussion about my due date being a little bit off based on the date of our embryo transfer....but the doctor said "It doesn't matter because you won't make it that far anyways." So we will be leaving it at October 7th.  So according to the fertility clinic I was 9 weeks 5 days and according to the OB (and the measurements of the babies) I was 10 weeks 1 day.

Both little hearts were fluttering away.  174 and 176 respectively.

And now for  a shout out to my fertility clinic that missed the fact that I had a SUBCHORIONIC HEMATOMA!!!!  Thats right...after all of those tears and stress of thinking I was having a MC, there was a source of the bleeding after all.  The doctor said it is now measuring 1mm and that it is nothing to worry about.  Whew.  Would have been nice to know when I was bleeding for 3 straight weeks!

I asked my long list of questions.....one of which DH was especially pleased with: "When can we stop pelvic rest?"  The doctor (who was about 65 years old mind you) looked at his watch and said, well at least wait till you get to the car.  I had to hold back the gigantic laugh I wanted to let out!  Then DH and the doctor high-fived.  I know, I know...sounds like the scene from a sitcom...true story though.

I also asked about having a cercalage-doc said won't be necessary because I will be monitored so closely since we are having twins.  I also asked about c-section vs. natural birth-doc said they will respect whatever we would like to do, however there is a tendency with twins for baby B to flip breech after baby A is delivered.  (We are leaning towards a planned c-section at this....yeah I know I am a horrible person....deal with it!). 

We had an uneventful meeting with a nurse who told us everything we already knew about pregnancy (what not to eat, what not to do, what medicines not to take).  I kind of wanted to shake her and say "These babies cost us 30K to conceive...don't you think we've done our research...afterall I'm not 18, clueless as to who the baby dady is, and living on welfare."

That about sums it up.  We will be going back next Friday for our NT scan.  We are opting to not do the tri-screen because it doesn't give us any information specific to one baby...and truth be told...the results of the tests will not alter our decision to continue this pregnancy.

Here are the most recent pics of our little bambinos:

8dp6dt

***WARNING-Pregnancy announcement and symptoms mentioned.  I know how much I hated reading about this on other blogs when I wasn't in a good place. I will never forget how hard this journey has been and know that it is far from over!  I respect all of my fellow IF'ers.

I am still soaking in the fact that I am pregnant. I guess you could say I am cautiously optimistic.  As an IF patient its so hard to wonder "what if."  I am trying to bury that thought WAYYY back in my brain.

DH and I told our parents last night.  My mom cried and screamed and my dad just laughed.  If all goes well this will be the first grandbaby for my parents.  It will be the 5th for DH's side.  Hands down it was the best phone call of my life: )

Since yesterday I've had this dull nauseated feeling that I have chalked up to nerves.  It woke me up a few times last night.  It stuck around and seemed to get worse today.  On my way to my car this afternoon I yaked in my mouth at the sight of a frozen yogurt spilled on the floor of the garage because it looked like vomit.  I think it is WAYYY to early for morning sickness, but some of the girls on the message boards say they've had it this early.  I don't think I'm willing to admit to it quite yet.

My boobs also seem huge today and there are definitely bright blue veins popping out of them.  If I didn't know I was pregnant I would probably wouldn't think anything of it.  But it's interesting to see that it really is a symptom!

Tomorrow is beta #2.  I am praying for anything greater than 140!

I like to think that I have paid my dues and should have a completely uneventful pregnancy and take home a perfect bundle of joy in 252 days, but I am not stupid or naive.  So I ask the good lord to watch over me and this baby and carry us through safely!

Blogging....for real this time!

I have this awful habit of stopping my blogging every time I find out I'm not pregnant. So you have probably guessed...I'm not pregnant.

IVF here we come! We've officially been told that IVF is our only hope in getting pregnant. I plan on blogging about it every step of this painful and expensive journey!

Ok Ok.....I suck at blogging.....

So obviously the result of my first injects cycle was a BFN...otherwise I'd have things to blog about. I will really try to be better about it.

Anyways, I have been in a complete and utter funk. The day after DH and I had a negative test, one of my friends, which god bless his heart (and by the way...you will soon figure out that "God bless his/her heart" is how us Tennessee folk begin any statement in which we talk bad about someone) is such an asshole. He and his wife knew the struggle we have been having....all of the heartache, $$, and tears we have poured into trying to start a family. Well after all of that, he calls me (as his very first person to tell) and says… “Guess what….I’m going to be a daddy.” I really tried to grin and bear it and be happy for them….but hot shit….she was on the damn pill and they were barely trying. (In her defense, they put her on the pill so that she could ovulate normally). I had a COMPLETE melt down…..I mean come on….literally 24 hours after I found out that $3,000, 15 or so needle pokes, 6 ultrasounds, and at least 5 different people with their hands in my lady business later we aren’t pregnant you call me first to tell me this. If I were a rational person (which I’m not) I’d be elated that he told me before his wife even went in for a blood test to tell me. Then not 2 weeks later another friend our age announced her pregnancy on facebook! Needless to say I blocked all of the pregnant people form my facebook. I guess that makes me a gigantic child, but I have realized throughout all of this that the number one person I need to look out for is me….and listening to how nice it is to sleep through the night while you know your little bean is in your womb is really not helping me in the least.

Whew…Ok, now to catch everyone up.

So after my cycle AF finally showed up and I went in for my baseline thinking we could jump right into our next cycle. WRONG. I had 16 cysts between my two ovaries and they were so enlarged I was forbidden from doing any physical activities in fear of my ovaries twisting. Yay…so not only did I put on 8 lbs from this cycle…now I have to take a month off from exercise…the one thing that has kept me sane. So I now went from playing with the 150’s to tipping over 170. EHHHHHHHHHHHH. Sucks. So they put me on birth control pills and told me to come back when AF starts again.

Which brings us to now….I am now on CD8….went for my E2 and U/S yesterday. E2 was up to 221 but I have no measureable follicles. I go back this Saturday…so hopefully I’ll have something to report.

Anyways….my hope is to blog more about life and try to focus less on getting pregnant….because it’s making me CRAZY.

Talk to you later!

And for a good laugh:

Making a baby is sexy!

So if you read my previous post...you guessed right. We decided to go ahead and do the IUI despite the increased risk of multiples. I am SOOOO glad we decided to now because we found out that DH's counts are down quite a bit from the last time.

All in all, the whole processes wasn't bad at all. We arrived at the clinic at 9am. DH did his thing. They brought both of us back to an exam room just after 10:30. Two nurses were in the room with us. They went over the sperm counts. I was really down over them...in hindsight I shouldn't have shown my poor husband that I was upset...I know it was just a blow to his manhood...no pun intended. There were 0% type A and only 4.4 million total. I asked her if it was even possible to get pregnant with no type As and she said it happens all the time. It was relieving to hear that.

So I assumed the position. The nurse put the speculum in and then the catheter. It was a totally differnet experience that my first IUI...not painful at all. The cath slipped right into my cervix and she put the baby batter in there. Didn't even cause cramping. The set an alarm for 15 minutes. When the time was up, I got dressed and we were out of there.

I have realized throughout this cycle that the next time I hear someone who is pregnant complain about how much morning sickness sucks...or how swollen their feet are...i might just deck them. People have no idea how unmagical the journey to conceive a baby is when you are an infertility patient! I just don't want to hear it! I will without a doubt relish every bout of morning sickness and every kick to my bladder when I get pregnant!