About Me

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Nashville, TN, United States
I am a mom to amazing twin girls, a wife, and I work full time. I battled infertility for 2 years and over the course of treatments, a twin pregnancy, and raising twins I managed to gain about 80 lbs. I’ve lost about 50 lbs so far and would like to lose another 50 in my quest to become a hot mama.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Bracing for the return to work

I find myself having small panic attacks....a lot lately.  The idea of leaving my sweet angels with some stranger I don't know and letting them spend more time with my babies than I do makes me sick to my stomach.  The idea that I will only get a few hours with the girls before they have to go the bed after work has me terrified.  I know it is still a month off, but I find myself panicking all of the time.  I would give anything to be a SAHM, but it's just not possible.

How did you overcome leaving your baby for the first time?  I know I have built it up to be a much worse event than it is, but I just can't stop thinking about it.


  1. I've only been leaving Paisley for about 4-5 hours at a time so far, but it's not been as bad as I expected. I get busy while I'm gone, so time goes quickly. Now, I have NO idea how I'm going to handle it when I have to leave her more frequently (which sadly is coming soon)!

    It's amazing how attached we get so quickly and how much it breaks my heart to think of being away from her!!!

  2. Can't help ya. I'm in the same boat!

  3. It sucks. I lucked on in that my daycare is at work. But it still sucked. The thing I like now is that they do lots of fun stuff and my daughter has good buddies there. (she's 3) I think it would be hard to have her do so many fun things and get to play with friends that much. But I do wish I worked a little less.

  4. It is really hard and the difficulty of it comes and goes. I worked myself up, like you, for that first day and it was actually nice to be out of the house for awhile. By three weeks, it became difficult because reality set in. Just try to keep yourself busy and remember that you have to do it. I remember everytime that I take them to the doctor that it's because I work hard for it (we use my insurance, which is awesome and mostly why I work). The best part is that I can tell that they are excited to see me and that's such a great feeling.

    Hugs to you!! It won't be as bad as you think it's going to be!

  5. I feel guilty about saying that it hasn't been hard, but I think it's because I know she's home with her daddy. In a month, she'll be with the babysitter and the thought of her crying all alone without one of us to comfort her is giving me nightmares. What I know is that it will be OK. The babies will be OK and you might even enjoy having some time to yourself (if you can call work that!). At least that's I hope I feel. So basically, i have no answers for you =)
    Hang in there!!!

  6. i took our last month and turned them into half days that away i got another part time month, hey 4 was better than 8 to 10, then we changed up the babies schedule a bit so that they went to bed later so i got a bit more time, then we got help with the things that took time away from us and the babies, tom took one day and i tool another where we did everything to keep the house running and the other had one on one with the girls and nothing else...when we had our second set of girls i just stayed home...the quality time i had with the first was more than our second so i cant say although it felt like it that we missed as much as i thought...cause i knew the time i had needed to be quality not quanity...if you could just squeeze a little more time maybe?

  7. This is my first time to comment on your blog, although I always read it! Just thought I would share my experience with you beacuse I dealt with this a little over a year ago.

    First, yes, it does suck but it's a trasitional time, and unfortunately, it has to happen. Like you, I HAD to go back to work.

    I, too, was dreading going back and would get all panic-y and emotional about leaving Avery with someone else. I would count down the weeks and it was on my mind constantly. Honestly, I feel like me worrying about it really interferred with just enjoying my time at home with her, especially that last month. So my best advice is just ENJOY your last month at home with them. Try to start preparing yourself mentally, knowing that it's something you have to do and everything will be just fine.

    I was able to transition slowly back to work...I would go to work for a few hours and then I worked from home too for a bit (which was the HARDEST thing ever because well working and taking care of a baby is just HARD!). See if maybe you can do a slow transition.

    My daughter is almost 21 months. She loves going to school. She loves her teachers, she loves her friends. She does activities and plays with other kids all day long, which she wouldn't be able to do if she were home with me.

    This is hard, I know, but focus on the positive! There are some days that I can't wait to go to work!

  8. Being a working mom is hard. Especially on Sunday nights (like right now). You should try to just enjoy the next month with them. Don't assume that you will always have the same work situation. When I went back to work 5 years ago I was full time and worked from home 3 days a week. That allowed me to find a babysitter that I got to observe taking care of my daughter. Now 3 kids later I'm working part time and that babysitter still takes care of my girls and loves them. Enjoy now and don't stress about the future because you don't know what it will look like.

  9. I'm able to take my Little One to work with me; so I'm actually in the opposite position, and would theoretically love to drop her off for a few hours so I could actually get significant work accomplished and maybe an errand or two run without baby wrangling. BUT I think if I was actually facing it, I would feel more like you do. No advice, just sympathy!