About Me

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Nashville, TN, United States
I am a mom to amazing twin girls, a wife, and I work full time. I battled infertility for 2 years and over the course of treatments, a twin pregnancy, and raising twins I managed to gain about 80 lbs. I’ve lost about 50 lbs so far and would like to lose another 50 in my quest to become a hot mama.

Wednesday, April 8, 2009

How the hell did I get here?

Hey everyone. I've never blogged before...but given how much the journey into fertility has sucked...I thought it might be a nice outlet!

Let's see...I am 24 years old (that's right...24....and infertile). I never imagined in a million years (ok...well 24 years) that I would be one of those women that so desperately wants a baby that I would do anything to my body or spend vast amounts of money to get it. But alas…here I am. My hubby is 30 years old. We are your typical working stiffs. Get up, go to work, go the gym, eat dinner, pass out 30 minutes later, wash, rinse, repeat. I work at a major university in Nashville in research ethics. It’s pretty much a fancy title for getting to tell MDs and PhDs that they did something wrong. I kind of like it. I also go to school part time…working on my Masters degree as a Nurse practitioner in psychiatric medicine. Ironic given how crazy this fertility stuff has made me. The hubby works for a record label…putting music in movies and commercials, etc. Lots of extra hours at the office and more travel than I’d like…. But he’s the sugar daddy…so I won’t complain.

We’ve been married for 2 years (this May). Time sure flies. We have been trying to get pregnant for about a year now. It’s funny to think about how many years we dated and focused on not getting pregnant. Seems a little silly to have spent all of that money on contraception! Hindsight is 20/20 I guess. Last year I was diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). To sum it up PCOS is an endocrine disorder that affects approximately 5% of all women and is the most common hormonal disorder among women of reproductive age, and is a leading cause of infertility. The principal features are weight problems, lack of regular ovulation and/or menstruation, and excessive amounts or effects of androgenic (masculinizing) hormones. The symptoms and severity of the syndrome vary greatly among women. While the causes are unknown, insulin resistance, diabetes, and obesity are all strongly correlated with PCOS.
Yay…so not only am I infertile…but I will also have the joy of battling my weight and hormones all my life and likely die of some type of cardiac problem. Can’t lie….finding out I had PCOS was a little bit of a relief. I always wondered why all of the dieting in the world wouldn’t make me thin. Now I know.
On top of the PCOS, we found out DH has some motility problems. He sucked it up and went to a urologist (after many months of TTC) and found out he had prostatitis. Doc sent him home with some antibiotics….hopefully that’ll do the tricks.
Ok….so to date…..we’ve been seeing a fertility specialist for about 6 months. 3 failed rounds of Clomid, 3 large cysts after each and every Clomid cycle, one trip to the emergency room for a severe allergic reaction to progesterone, and about $4,000 later we are now moving on to the big league drugs.
I am starting my first round of injectible drugs as soon as AF shows up. My doc prescribed Follistim 900IU pen. The thought of actually sinking that needle into my stomach every night makes me a little queasy….or maybe it’s the price tag of this cycle (~$2300 to $3000). Getting knocked up is not for the poor!
Thus far insurance hasn’t covered shit. So nice to know that I pay into it every month and get squat out of it.
So now I am just sitting and waiting for AF to arrive so I can get this show on the road. I just finished up a 10 prescription of Prometrium to induce AF. So far nothing. As soon as I start I have to go in for a baseline U/S and hormone level check. The doc also wants me to have an HSG done…..not looking forward to that at all.
So that’s my shitty journey thus far! I am really looking forward to meeting others who have shared this experience….and hate it as much as I do!

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